more firsts...

i finally decided to cut my hair here. can't stand the grassyness. so it's the first time i cut hair in aus! along with it cam the wild decision that i wanted... i dyed my hair! first time too! it's nice! love it, something along chestnut brown. shall upload photo next time.

and first time cook for 11 ppl at 1 go. stress. they wanted to try my cooking so i stupidly agreed. i mean, 2-3 was fine, but 11?! so i wasn't successful in my cooking today, screwed up. mainly cos of me lah of cos. but chef otherwise, my equipment were lousy or inadequate, with ladles too small to reach the end of the pot to stir...etc. shall try again! korean chilli octopus or squid is my next attempt! so disappointing. the dish i cook today was usually good when it was for 2. today it looked totally different! must learn how to manage big amts! moving up to restaurant levels mah... must learn to cook in large quantities, with great quality. although they said it was quite nice. i know it's words of comfort. but i was just so angry i couldn't eat. why must it turn out that way? i put effort in lor... to go buy, carry all the way. so much ingredients. prepared for 2 hrs in the kitchen. to realise the final was crap. shall learn new dishes, and next time i'll cook for less ppl, or in portions. cooking all in one huge pot is hard to gauge factors!

anyway, no link to wad i said previously, random, but i made a new quote: Get real, Go fake.

I always knew why I wasn't well-liked...

sitting alone in a corner with my hands over my knees. would u pity me, or just look and not bother, or start thinking wad kind of weirdo is that? that is who u see me on the outside, and hence the 1st impression. many a time, i had to hold back my feelings or thoughts. cos i've not yet come out, and i couldn't just blab away my true self. but i get sick of myself. there's so much i wanna share.

inside me, the bubbly nature is held back, pressed back deep into me. as it tries to free itself, it hurts so much. i just wanna be me! cheerful, outgoing, fun to be with; and not boring, quiet and weird.

about any kind of relationship, it's like knocking two stones together. one knock, and u create a spark. a few more times, a small fire, but if too many times, u've created a fire too big it goes out of control, a fire disaster. just when u thought a little friction could provide some warmth, the spark causes a huge fire, one in which u cant subside. the fire brigade comes in and sprays it all down. and wad's left is rubble, though memories still live on.

not emoing, just thinking...

on another thought, why am i slacking so much! getting into vet sci is no easy feat. must focus! and i am sad that i'm missing out on too many 21sts! even my own!

Royal Easter show!

Carnivals, farms, theme parks, game stalls. a major event annually in sydney that is situated at the olympic park, where sydney hosted the olympics in 2000.

me and lin and sut went. it was hilarious, when me and lin started small at the swing, and boldly tired the mega throw machine that rotated to heights of i think... 100m? it was just so high up. experienced zero gravity continuously, while i screamed my lungs out... haha!

saw loads of aniamls, farm animals. competitions were going on for cattle, sheep, poultry, dogs, cats, horses. and i got to touch so many of them. the baby lambs were so petite and extremely shy! but they got all cuddly when u got near them. as i patted a dairy cow, i told myself no feelings were to be developed as i may have to drink it's milk and slaughter it for that fabulous steak one day. i told it, and it simply mooed. sigh... life of a cow.

went out for a movie at hoyts with kris and kota a few days back. my first movie in sydney! and it's ex. $14 with student concession. why?! i still wanna watch monster vs aliens 3D at imax. it has the world's largest screen, but it's $25... tsk. up by pixar is coming up, and harry potter fans... trailer is on! so some movies to look forward to!

Hunter Valley, Nelson Bay, Newcastle

these are the places i travelled to for the past 3 days. fun... and definitely lead an atas lifestyle! we rented and car and drove for 2 hrs up north sydnay. and i actually got to drive in the 3 days, travelling more than 100kph on aussie roads! *thrilled* but also quite dangerous, recounting the near death experiences along roundabouts. haha.

we had too much wine to drink, too much cheese and chocolates to eat (of which more than half i still couldn't name), too many beautiful skies, vineyards, sunrises/sunsets, beaches to soak in. too much to do (horse-riding, visiting wildlife reserves, vineyards and factories, star-gazing), sigh. too atas. life sucks! haha. this is to dig into those who're having their exams.

jealous? well. i was having my break, but now it's back to work.

Happy easter!

easter here means a week's break from sch. and of course, the resurrection of jesus christ our lord.

haha! i know a lot of uni students in sin are having exams! but we're having hols! yeah! anyway, i tried to go for a latin mass just now. it was fine, except... i didn't understand a thing the priest was saying and i just followed suit, kneel, stand, sit, kneel, stand ,sit. haha. quite funny. the prayers r in latin. as the name suggests, it shud all be in latin. so i sat back and tried to listen. and half way thru the mass did i realise he was speaking english! for the gospel only. but still, i was like lol. he went," so we can see mumermumermmejrhbwevcwjhvjwhc and today mnvbewhyrvchwevjhrvcjhevjhe, but for the lsjrbfiwebchwebvjwebhh." haha. ya i could only make out a few of the words he said.

on the way back, strangers wished me happy easter, so happy. i even got choc eggs! and i passed the bubble tea shop and couldn't resist so i bought a taro milk tea. oh my... so yummy!

went chinatown to stock up for the week again. so heavy lah, carry all by myself. walked there and back to save on transport costs. sigh, why so sad. and when i returned, guess who i saw sitting under my apartment at the fastfood outet oporto? weibin! my ex-pc studying in UQ. he drove down for hols during easter. so 巧！

yup, me driving down with a grp of frens up north sydney to hunter's valley for wine tasting in horse carriage then go watch whales maybe? atas hor. budget one lah. then going to royal easter show. so many things i wanna do! visit manly beach, imax, the zoos and aquariums. haha. but must rmb to do homewrk wor... and house work, that i seem to be the only one doing all for my room even though there's another. wanna move out. here too ex. and i wanna just take care of myself. sick of cleaning up after others, or cooking, washing, cleaning, not doing able to do things properly in the dark as another's sleeping. etc. i need my own room. haha. full of complaints hor...

ok. see ya!

boredom in my room

so many times i get bored. i mean, not that i wanna slack, but short breaks at the end of the day should be fine right. the thing is that the tv addict here has no tv to watch. got lah, but only angmoh shows, which r soooo boring. wanna watch videos also too ex due to internet restrictions. miss singaporean food, tv shows, taiwanese vareity progs... and bubble tea. they do sell it here but it's $4plus per cup... so tempted to buy as i walked pass the shop just now. one of the first thing to do when i return is to have taro/strawberry/choc snowshake or milktea! with many many pearls!

the thing with boredom is that even cooking has become my form of 'leisure'. and since i prepare my own meals, it's kinda the only part of the day i can relax. such ironies.

can't wait to meet up and get back my singaporean self. i'm so fake here with all the accents. have to cos they understand u better if u say it they way they do.

ok. till later! or how the aussies say it: " c ya lighda!"